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I used to complain to her about Jim’s antics, but since she never listens to my bellyaching (Her words again) I have stopped bitching and gone with the flow.So here we are, sitting on the couch watching the Miami Dolphins get the shit kicked out of them by the New England Patriots, Lori and Martha had gone to places unknown and wouldn’t be back till seven and I had just handed Jim his third beer and there was still ten minutes left in the first quarter.That’s when he asked the question. He turned to me and with a very serious look on his face he said.“Bill, can I ask you a very personal question?”I was sort of surprised because we almost never talked about anything personal, so I did really think he would ask anything like he did.“Yeah, sure I guess.” I told him.“Now be honest ok, this is important to me.”“Uh ok.”“Have you ever given a guy a blowjob?”“WHAT?”“Have you ever sucked a guy’s dick?”“Why do you want to know that?”“I told you it’s important to me. Let’s say a certain person. I drove my fist into the man's solar plexus and laid him out on the floor. Some blood came out with his breath, so I knew that he needed an ER as soon as possible. Both of our assailants were completely out of action, so I had plenty of time to call the cops and EMS on Liz's cellphone. Liz and I stood outside to wait for the emergency response. I had picked up the gun before we left the room, being careful not to affect its use as potential evidence.This time, the cops beat the EMS people, and we were in the process of telling our story to the cops when the medics arrived. We spent an hour with the cops telling and retelling our story, but they finally let us go when we promised to come by the police headquarters to swear out a complaint against the two would-be muggers.This was just another day at the office as far as I was concerned, but Liz was pretty shaken by the whole affair. I took her home and wound up spending the night with her, yes, in her bed. I did find out that she was.
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