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If a test program functions perfectly, all subsequent systems will malfunctionIf a program is useful, it will have to be changed corollary:If a program is useless, it will have to be documented.All programs expand to fill available memory corollary:All programs expand beyond the ability of the programmer to understand them.Interchangeable files won’tRegardless of the units used by the customer, the programmer shall use his own arbitrary units, convertible only by means of weird & unnatural conversion factors. Speed, for example, will be expressed as furlongs per fortnight.Files that cannot be destroyed will be.Investment in reliability will increase until it exceeds the cost of errors, or until someone insists that work be done.A carelessly planned program takes 4 times longer to complete than a carefully planned system, which takes only 3 times as long as expected.There’s always one more bug.A system could be designed that’s foolproof, but only a fool would want it.If the input. There was no tape for the top floor and the unit for that floor was off. He realised that she was saving money – after all, the units on the lower floors would have picked up any intruder.He remembered that he had said in his note that he would contact her when he returned, so he locked the office and rang the doorbell of her flat. There was a long pause and he thought she must be out on her rounds. Then the door opened.A man stood in the doorway. He had clearly just awoken and he did not look happy. His blond hair was mussed up and his blue eyes were bloodshot. He was a good deal younger and taller than Victor, and while a good looking man was out of condition. Too much booze and late nights, thought Victor.“What do you want?” growled the man.“I’m Victor Freeman from the top floor. Is Susan in?”“No.”“Would you give her a message, please?”“I don’t know. What is it?”“Just tell her that I’m back if she needs me for anything, and that she can resume cleaning the flat whenever she’s.
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