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I stared at it as though it was a live grenade. In fact, I felt pretty much the same way I'd felt back in basic training when we'd done live grenade practice. That afternoon my hands were sweating so bad I could barely hang on to the thing, much less throw it. I was practically pissing in my pants at the time so it wasn't until afterwards that I felt sorry for the training NCO assigned to show us. After all, he had to sit there while 40 or so wet-behind-the-ears idiot kids played soldier pulling the pin out and throwing the things over the eight-foot blast wall in front of us.OK, perhaps that's a little overdone. I wasn't pissing in my pants this afternoon, but those squirrels sure has hell knew something was up. I sat down at the table. Fell down, really. Drew a deep breath. Another one. Stared at the stupid book.This is Julie's diary. Julie. Our daughter. Do you really want to know? Does she want you to know? She trusts you. She trusts her mother, too. Are you going to betray that. When a commercial break came on, I put my Tivo in pause mode and we went to the kitchen to get some refills on drinks (well, I decided to can the idea of studying and moved to wine, for her I was getting the refill) and some snacks. We kidded around about things and laughed a great deal. Returning to the living room we decided that the drama that had initially grabbed us, was now getting boring and I played a sitcom from earlier in the week that I hadn’t seen. It was very funny and a little raunchy. As we were watching it Simone said, ‘Have you ever had a blowjob while watching this show?’ OK. I wasn’t sure where this was going, but I liked the way it looked here at the start. ‘To tell you the truth, I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a blowjob while watching a sitcom,’ I told her honestly after a moment’s reflection. ‘It’s not that I’m against concurrent sitcoms and blowjobs, it’s just that the situation has never come up.’ I finished with a knowing nod. ‘Well,’ she said, ‘let’s see how.
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