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I didn’t come out or start dating women until I was 30. At the time it seemed like such a relief to not have to perform a hetero role because I had a lot of deeply buried feelings that I had to deal with. Having a break from social expectations of heterosexuality helped me to redefine myself. Some people have a hard time wrapping their brains around the idea of a changeable gender because they see a natural definition of gender roles that seems rather inherent. However, I am not one who sees gender as either/or. I think that we all have a different combination of both male and female characteristics. Some people lean more to one or the other end of the spectrum but just because they perceive themselves that way does not mean that they are incapable of experiencing the other side of the spectrum. Now it seems like my feelings are coming full circle. Don’t ask me what that means exactly, because I don’t really know. I’m still not interested in men the way I used to be, but I dont’ feel. Mark Matthews. I was a married woman ready to takeher place in society. I was a married woman ready to submit to herhusband's conjugal desires. I was a married woman ready to start a newhome with my new husband. I was a married woman.I was still wearing the pink suit and white silk blouse of my going-awayoutfit. I was beautiful. Mom and Martha were right to have insisted thatI buy this outfit and wear it as we drove away from the wedding. My pinklipstick and the pink tint of my makeup completed the image of a young,beautiful, virginal, ing?nue off on her wedding honeymoon with the manof her dreams. I smiled as I looked at my image in the mirror.My breasts were heaving a bit under the suit jacket. I was cute,standing there with my hands neatly clasped in front of me, feet firmlytogether. The pink shoes, four-inch high-heeled pumps, were simplystunning on me, and the white lacy stockings only added to my allure.But, I had to get ready for my husband and he expected a sexy wife toemerge.
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