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It was like it was happening to four other people.I think this is what a lot of people who make it big in show business have to go through. But where they make it big and don't have anything inside themselves to fall back on and destroy themselves trying to live a crazy life that they can't handle, we had each other.No, I'm not trying to be some arty farty ass hole mouthing insincere words to sound like what he isn't, not at all. But what I am saying is that we had ourselves anchored to each other in a way that worked for us. And also, we had Reo, the wonder baby. Any way, that's what Homer named him as a joke and it sort of stuck. Connie gave birth to Nadine, who at one year of age already showed promise of the great beauty of both her mammas. Since we all had each other and that should have been enough; but it wasn't."Let's just do our own style of music and if it works, fine and dandy. And if it doesn't, fuck 'em. Wilbur can always go back to drivin' a garbage truck and Homer will. Wanting to feel your arms around me as I suck your bottom lip and nuzzle against your neck. Wanting you to make love to me over and over and over again.I finally stop my fantasizing long enough to get ready for bed. Even though it was cold and damp out, I put on a sheer negligee and even add a quick spritz of perfume. I laugh at myself, without humor, for doing this. Whom am I trying to fool? I crawl under my blankets and think of you again. I think what it would be like to have you here beside me. How it would be to feel the warmth of your body next to me and how it would be to have you reach for me and pull me into your arms. I turn to my side, almost prepared to see you lying there... but all that is there is an empty space; as empty as the feeling I experience having a lover whom I've never seen nor actually spoken to. I close my eyes and make myself go to sleep only to dream of you once again.******Oh, yes. I dream of you just as I fantasize about you, but with more passion than.
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