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Wife: “Who?” Me: “My arse cheeks”“So let me get this straight” the prosecutor says to the defendant. “You came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man”. “That’s correct” says the defendant. “Upon which” continues the prosecutor “you take out a pistol and shot your wife, killing her”. “That’s correct” says the defendant. “Then my question to you is - why did you shoot your wife and not her lover?” asked the prosecutor. “It seemed easier” replied the defendant “than shooting a different man every day!”My wife came back from work yesterday and yelled at me “All my friends’ husbands have bought an original pink and brown Juicy handbag!” I replied with a wink “Okay love, but tonight you’ll have to provide some pink and brown for me”. I was astonished when she nodded in agreement. I had always dreamt of this moment and it was finally here and, without fail, I went upstairs that night, and was not disappointed. It was just as good as I had ever imagined. My very. The lowly savages of Oceanus have a spark of intelligence after--" Stop it!"Duric fell silent. A tiny smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.Kyllos paused and closed his eyes. He remained still as a meditation prayer manifested in his thoughts. When the final words had passed through Kyllos' mind, he opened his eyes, his gaze like steel. "I can no longer tell whether you misunderstand the Inonni way because of a true lack of comprehension or simply out of spite." Well, that makes me feel better. I can confuse the Inonni. All right, allow me to enlighten you, if that phrase does not offend you coming from me. I could give up my title. I could abdicate. But that would feel like tacit approval from me. I would feel as if I were freely handing control of the nation to you. No, Kyllos. If you want to truly claim you have complete mastery over Oceanus, you will have to depose me. And I intend to give you all the reason in the world to do so."Duric turned on his heel and marched back.
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