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But I don’t want to spend my life in misery over choices I have made. I suffered through many years, and I believe I’ve paid for my sins against you. Still, there you are, dominating my thoughts. Today, when my life has settled, when my nest is complete, and I have time to think, I spend most of my extra time thinking about you. There is a part of me that longs to break my promises in this life I have chosen. There are several parts of me that want to run away, to you. And yet, another part of me wonders if I am the biggest fool on earth for even thinking you care about me after all these years. I will never know if you only wish to watch me suffer like this, or if you also feel the burning desire to be together, again. It would serve me right if it is merely amusement for you. I loved you with every ounce of my being, from the very moment we became girlfriend and boyfriend as kids. Perhaps it’s biological. Perhaps women can never really shut off that part of us that longs for our. ‘Your loosing fuel from your left engine.’ ‘Sweet, cancel restart on one,’ snapped Conner, knowing that her leaking right engine could explode if restarted. She and Sweet could end up dead real quick. ‘Roger, restart canceled,’ repeated Sweet. ‘Attempting restart on engine two.’ Conner scanned her instruments. They had yet to reach 5,000 feet. She was loosing speed fast. ‘Diamond One, to tower. I had a Bird Strike. Say again Bird Strike. Lost both engines. We are a rock.’ ‘Roger Diamond One. Turn right to one seven zero for emergency approach.’ Sweet reported, ‘No restart on two.’ ‘Negative return, Tower,’ stated Conner. ‘Repeat we are a rock.’ She glanced in the mirror. ‘Sweet, find me a clear spot. Make it a big one.’ Conner scanned her instruments again. They were already loosing altitude and their speed was still dropping. ‘Negative restart engine two,’ reported Sweet. ‘There! The golf course, to your left beyond the school and the trees.’ Conner looked. ‘Anything closer?’ .
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