” Mother snorted, resting her head against the wall, “Still, he’s the only one of them who could’ve pulled it off.” “Is he?” I asked, “Think, Mother; who has the most to gain from your death?” “I don’t know!” Mother cried, “I lost my worth the moment I married your father! Ever since then my only value has been my ability to make children!” Mother dropped her head, “And even that, I failed at. Oh, Yavara…” Mother sniffled, “I know I should hate her, but I can’t. You think it’s because I’m a traitor, but it’s just mother’s love. You’ll understand when you have a child.” I placed a hand on my belly. “Then I’ll reach enlightenment in the winter.” Mother’s gaze shot to mine, and her face broke into a wide smile. “You’re pregnant?”I nodded. “Oh, that’s wonderful!” Mother’s joy was unfeigned and unfettered, “I’m so happy for you and Eric!” “It’s a boy.” “Well, you can’t know that yet.” Mother smiled crookedly at me, “Everyone always proclaims it’s a boy, and half are disappointed.” “But I. They skated beautifully, totally relaxed and unhurried, yet with great speed. Again – beautiful! And all kinds of blue. Christmas was a family thing but at New Year the usual procedure was to party with your friends. This I had never done, of course, since I had no friends before. I was very proud this year to have four people coming to our little party. I had insisted that there should be plenty of alcohol, but I had not managed to buy it. In Sweden all alcohol is sold is special shops to keep consumption down. Just before New Year those shops are full of needy and irritated people, making an awful ambience I just couldn’t handle. Magda sent me to get some good food while she took care of the liquor. I took care of the cooking. I will not bore you with details. I like to cook but it’s incredibly boring to watch someone cooking on TV. Reading about it must be even worse. I was pleased with the dinner, though. Magda Peter was totally wrapped up in his happiness with our engagement.
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