"Sure," I said. The suitcases were still on my floor, unopened."Right," Mom said. "What am I, stupid?"Poor Sheila blushed. "Well, uh..." she stammered."Relax," Mom said. "If I had cared, I would've put you in the guest room."Shortly after that, Dad came home, and got to meet Sheila. Mom got supper on, and we all went in to the dining room to eat."Hey, is there a mall around here?" Sheila asked as we ate. "I need to go shopping, maybe tomorrow." Sure," I said. "We can do that." I need a new coat," she grinned. "The heaviest one I've got isn't heavy enough for this weather."Dad started singing a parody version of an old Frank Sinatra song: "Chicago, Chicago, it's twenty below. Chicago, Chicago, the wind and the snow."Sheila cracked up, looked at me, and said, "Now I know where you get your quirky sense of humor." Quirky?" Quirky. Hey, it's better than geeky. You geek," she grinned."Jock." Brainiac." Musclehead."My parents were cracking up."Musclehead's my favorite term of endearment,". On the first page, a stern looking Headmaster, Mr Wackford, welcomes you to the school.‘St Mabyn’s,’ you read ‘was constructed in the 19th century for the education of…’ blah blah ‘…extensive modifications in the 1950s and 70s…’ blah blah ‘…closed for ten years between 1986 and 1996…’ Hmmm… no mention of the reason for the closure: Some unorthodox practices amongst its staff which resulted in a police raid and the arrest of most of the teachers.It was rumoured that after ten years many of the original staff returned to open the ‘new’ St Mabyn’s – a high school fetish theme holiday, where adults got to dress as school pupils and teachers and act out some of the adolescent fantasies that they never quite achieved in their own school days.For better of for worse, that is the holiday that you have chosen this year. You have taken a fortnight off work to spend two weeks in St Mabyn’s, appropriately enough in early September, just as the real schools are going back. Unlike many people, who.
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