"No, it's not," he thought to himself in response to the flash, "I'm dead."I tried to continue to assure him he was not dying nor had his host died. Because he'd left us, the connection was briefly broken. I knew we'd reconnect as soon as he reached his destination.I did the best thing I could think of and sped off to his operating room. Being just slightly more experienced than him, I was there first. I even had to wait a bit for him. I was thinking speed, so I misted more quickly than Kim.He returned to hover over the operating table in the same position I'd initially found him. He formed the thought, "Thank God, I'm not dead," upon seeing the surgery team hard at work. They were working with precision performing the difficult procedure to implant his new kidney.I surprised him when I said, "Told you so."Like before, I tugged on his leg, bringing him to stand beside me at the end of the operating table."Man, I was so worried," Kim admitted. "I just don't want to be dead right now.". I had recently found a stack of porn dvd's in my brother's room when I was looking for something else. I was kind of shocked but I wasn't surprised, and I took a couple of them and watched them.I'd never seen a porno before, and I was really kind of amazed at how they showed everything so graphically. I was also amazed at how beautiful and sexy all the performers were, especially the black men.I wasn't exactly in the deep south but about everyone I knew, including my own family was a little racist. I'd never really drawn on any feelings of my own about blacks, mainly because I'd never really been around any, But as I watched the black men on the screen I felt myself getting very excited by their bodies and their dark skin. I'd never would have imagined the spell of seeing these dirty dvd's would put over me.It stayed with me constantly, during the day, at night, in my dreams, in my fantasies. I was constantly thinking of black men.I began looking at interracial sites online, looking.
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