At first my fears were he would leave me, then it became he was going to pretend to love me in order to really hurt me at a later time. When he had been so silent that first day, after he read my letter to him, he had given no indication to me at all as to what he was thinking.His questions were asked in an almost mechanical way when he started to finally talk to me. The content of them surprised, and also made me feel like there might be a little love left for me; just a spark, and I clung to that hope with my whole being.After realizing we were going to try to stay together and watching John fight the demons I had loosed on him, I knew that this was going to be 'the' test of our marriage and our love for each other.Our lovemaking that afternoon was a test for me. I tried my very best to let John know that I would not refuse him anything as long as he showed his love for me in a manner that let me know that love was in his actions, not anger. I had been deeply hurt by his actions. ..I’m sorry, I couldn’t stop”, I said. She pulled my dick out of her throat and said, “don’t worry Ritchie, I know this is your first time so don’t worry about anything…just do what you feel like doing, you won’t hurt me”.Like a typical male, I put on hand on her head to control her. I felt the need to hold her head there so I could fuck her. I was losing control and began thrusting my big dick into her little mouth. I pushed her head down while thrusting up. I could hear her choking but I couldn’t stop. I needed to fuck. I needed to thrust while controlling her every movement. She was going to be mine until I ejaculated.I was going great holding back. I wanted her to feel my dick in her mouth for a while. She was right, I would last a lot longer the second time and I intended to fuck her mouth again…for a long time.I could feel the semen rising. I could do nothing to hold it back so I gripped her head with both hands. My dick hardened even more and she knew I was ready to.
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