” Darren’s head began to swim. He forgot about the cigarette and the cold. The idea of her seeing someone else was bad enough but to hear that he had so blatantly screwed up was worse. He began to get a sick feeling in his stomach, his guts tying themselves in knots. He had lost track of the conversation behind him but didn’t care. He wanted to get out of there. He dropped his smoke, turned and pulled open the door, practically falling inside. The warm air hit him but it didn’t make him feel any better. If anything, it made him feel worse. This couldn’t be. He had asked her out again but she said she was busy. She could have come back and said something later. Made a new date. So could you, dickhead, he thought to himself. Why didn’t you go up and ask her again? He couldn’t deal with this. He went up to his office and told his secretary that he was ill and was going home for the day. Once he was at home, he fell on the couch and tried to relax. Why are you acting like this? He. My eyes closed as I heard another swish of air that betrayed the newest arrival of the burning sensation. My voice sounded hoarse as I moaned: “More… Harder.” You listened to my pleading and started to hit in an increasing speed, each time a bit harder than the previous one. My whole body felt hot, but it was nothing compared to the burning sensation your flogger caused. You were reluctant at first, but after I pleaded, begged and debated for over two hours, you gave in. Of all the people in the world, you would understand most how I needed this pain today, how I needed a way to escape of what I was feeling inside. If you wouldn’t do it, I would myself in a different way, and it was against your rules, your wishes. So you obeyed mine, you gave me what I needed in a controlled way, without actual damage on the long run. I placed my sweaty forehead against the cool surface of the table, moved my hands slightly to accommodate my new position and tried to relax the muscles in my back in.
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