"Ben frowned slightly as he glanced at his watch."We damn near did..."Sue waited for him to continue; and when he didn't, she spoke again."What's eating you?"Ben took a deep drag off his cigarette and looked down at her. He managed a small smile."Nothing, I just wanted a little sleep. We did have a pretty good workout, you know."Sue returned the frown he had given her a few minutes earlier"Don't play games with me; I'm good old Sue, remember; I know you; you couldn't be the one to pull the plug on a sex orgy. You could have gone on another eight hours without feeling tired."Ben took a deep breath and shrugged."I don't know... I guess maybe it just wasn't what I'd been expecting. Maybe I expected too much."A puzzled expression filled Sue's face."How do you mean? I thought it was pretty wild."Ben nodded slowly."Yes, it was wild... I don't know. I sort of figured wife-swapping meant just exactly that; you know, you take off with him to one bedroom and I make it with her. Janice and Don. ’ And he smiles. Because what I lack, he contains. Where I am weak, he is not. A power for a weakness, a give for a take. In his eyes, I see the truth. I know that there is doom and pain ahead, and still I inch my body toward his, aching for that poison. Aligning myself with him, tipping my head to look into his eyes, indeed his very soul, laying my hand on his chest, I know I’ve found home. I haven’t the right. I want to step back, to leave this man, this poet, for someone else to find, but I cannot. He is there, his heart beating steady against my hand, and I am not possessed of the power to let him go. I feel the tears, building at the back of my eyes, threatening to spill over. I turn away, frantically. He can’t see me this way, know the depth of my pain, my need. But he touches me and I am lashed by that touch, rendered powerless. So I stay. Pulling me, back to belly, he slips his arms around my waist, pulling me down to lie at his side. I have never felt so encompassed, so.
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