We arrived back in the resort all together and Chantelle manoeuvred me slightly away from the others: What are you doing now? she asked, after your shower or this evening? It was intimate. Heading for more intimacy. Her face close to mine. She was magnetic, gorgeous, charismatic, fun&hellip, Christ. If we werent in public wed be touching, kissing even, then in an instant our clothes would be coming off and shed see IT. I panicked. Oh, I&hellip,I dont know, Chantelle, Im so sorry, Ill see you&hellip,tomorrow&hellip, and I fled, ignominiously, stupidly and rejectively. I rushed into my room on the verge of tears. Why couldnt I just SAY: Chantelle, look I have a giant clit, Im embarrassed about it but what do you think? It would be so simple, wouldnt it? Then itd be settled, one way or the other. But I couldnt. In the shower I had to have a look at the wretched thing, to see if there was any way it might be acceptable. It wasnt. I was a girl with a ridiculous little sausage between. ‘I’ve gotcha now! Cower, lower life forms.’ He shook the dice above his head in both hands, making a globe of his small, hairy knuckles. ‘Yeah, yeah, we’ll see, the tide may turn again bucko,’ said Al, not easily intimidated. ‘Hmm,’ I mused, ‘I’ve never been quite sure how well that really works as a metaphor. Do tides really ‘turn’ or do they just kind of rise and fall, go in and out, stuff like that?’ Al gave me a scowl. ‘You take that back, bastard. I’ll not have my gleaming metaphors besmirched.’ ‘Well,’ I answered, clenching my fists pugilistically, ‘those would be fightin’ words. Shall we call this a draw and get out the quarters and shot classes so we can settle this like men? Dr. Who’s coming up. We should each have at least three drinks in us before that show starts.’ John nodded vehemently. ‘Friends don’t let friends watch Dr. Who sober.’ ***** After emptying a bottle of Caribbean rum while watching the fluffy-haired Doctor confront stentorian Daleks, Al and I made our way.
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