” She said with a smile.As he scooped her into his arms again, she laid snuggly against him. She was not a heavy load but with the cast on her leg she was awkward, so he was pleased when they reached her bed. As he laid her on it the urge to run, washed over him. This woman made him feel things that he had never felt before, things he didn’t want to feel. She had worn home the hospital gown and robe they had given her, and it was a very unattractive set but still, he had these feelings. Just then Dr Riley and Elizabeth came into the room.“I just wanted to say goodbye Victoria and I’ll see you Tuesday.” Dr Riley said.“Ok, thank you.”“And I just wanted to make sure you were comfortable up here and if you need anything right now.” Elizabeth offered.“No thank you, I’m fine just really sleepy.”“Ok then sweet dreams.” Elizabeth said as they left the room, but Jamie just stood there.She smiled at him and he just smiled back.“Jamie?”“Oh, yes I’m sorry, I just wanted to let you know that the. ..........What a fucked up life this is I thought.I had taken my laptop to the states and on it I had photographs of Amanda and I in happier times, some nights my heart would feel heavy at the loss, but I never let it show in my few emails to Amanda, I had been in the states about 5 months when I received a email from Susan saying how worried she was about Amanda it seemed she had lost a lot of weight and was in trouble keeping on top of her job so much so that she had been forced to take some leave to sort herself out. Susan begged me to be kinder to Amanda and ended her email by adding that she really believed that Amanda thought what she was doing was for both our benefits and begged me to call Amanda for a chat if I still cared about her to help her through her depression.That evening I sat down and composed a long email in which I explained all my feelings, the betrayal, the sickness in my stomach and how I hated her and myself for letting it happen, I reminded her how I had.
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