"I pushed out the image of Zach and I in bed together and thought backagain to that night and applied the experience with women I'd had sinceand realized the truth."I'm sorry Katie. I did the things I thought I was supposed to do, thethings I'd picked up from the other guys. Hell you were there for someof those bullshit sessions. The times when we forgot you weren't a guyalready." Jimmy I'm glad you were my first guy and I'm ninety-nine and a halfpercent sure the reason I didn't orgasm wasn't you. I thought maybe itwas a first time thing or that I was doing something wrong. I did blameyou for a short while but that computer group I was in, there wereplenty of guys willing to sleep with a nerd girl. I tried it with acouple of them and it never happened. Then I thought I needed a reallyexperienced guy. I let my hair grow for a couple of months, put on ashort skirt and made an advance on a guy on campus with a reputation.Each time it felt good but there was never an explosion, never. See the white-skinned ladies covered in colorful transparent spider silk which makes them look like butterflies, richly decorated with gold and silver and diamond jewelry.From here, look down to the other side of the river where the city wall separates the workers quarters from the slums of the fourth caste. Look to the tends and wooden hoods between the offshoots of the jungle, where the poorest live in hunger and despair but still do their part to fight against the growth of the sprouts. Watch the dark-skinned girls only clothed with palm leafs, their skin covered in black and white tattoos, making fires to keep the permanently growing trees and grasses and lianas away. Smell the smoke and feel their pain standing in the heat of a lost cause, while deep dark columns of smoke build a wall between them and the Jungle. Raakshas towers over their heads, growing like a spore, with all his roots, and stems, boughs, leaves, and blooms coming over them like a tsunami in.
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