Seeing that girl and then that wholeevening with Jen was nice, it was one of the first pleasant moments in mylife that I've had since everything started. I felt a sense of peace Ihadn't felt in a long time. Could that be why I keep seeing her? I founda small moment of peace and my subconscious is wanting that to continue.I checked my time and see I'm approaching somewhere close to my 4th mile.Okay dreams are the same type of thing, maybe they were created for thesame reason. What I saw in the last dream though, why would it makesomething up like that. Could I really have turned out to be that animal?I started pulling everything I could remember from Biology and Healthclass and everything else I've read about hormones. Testosterone, Iremember, is evolutions way of helping the perpetuation of the species.It is responsible for aggression, the need to procreate, the higherchances of taking risks, typically the more testosterone one has the moreof a need to be an alpha male. I started. . I didn't really think that you... that you would get... pregnant... I've heard there are... ways... not to... I mean... that's what I've heard... that's what I meant" Ohhh John... of course there are ways... but don't you understand? Don't you see how much I love you? I love you so much that I want to have your child, I want to bear the fruit of our love. You know I've always wanted many children, but Michael didn't have the time to stay with me... he died so soon. I have missed a man by my side for so long, someone to love and care for, someone to enjoy pleasures as well as sorrows, someone to share parenthood with. Now you darling can be all this, my new loved husband. If not married to me, then at least the father of my children, head of the family. You are my man from now on, and I am you're woman... I love you John and I want to be together with you for the rest of my life... I care for you soo much..."There was silence... we were both thinking... I knew that want I wanted.
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