Jesse was my one true love from the moment I saw her. Suddenly, I was at a loss as to how to proceed. Finding a ball game and finding friends that shared my interests were suddenly unimportant. Meeting Jesse, getting to know Jessie, and finding time for Jesse were suddenly my top priorities.I was an intelligent and resourceful young man but I was new to the area. My opportunities to meet Jesse were hampered by three things. First, I didn't even know her name. Second, she ended up being an eighth grader while I was a ninth grader. This meant she had different classes and a different lunch period than I had. The third thing was that, although my parents had allowed me to set my own rules about dating, I suspected Jesse's parents would not allow her to even go on double dates.At that point things seemed hopeless. I could only sit in the lunchroom and stare out at her on the playground smiling and laughing with her friends, friends that would end up being my salvation. Jim, an. “ she blurts, before I cut her off again.“She can wait half an hour, can’t she?” I allow her only half a second to ponder“Well, can’t she?” I bark for an answer. Her burning red face breathes out a weak “yes”. She knows what she has just said ‘yes’ to. She’s just killed off the only external barrier she could use as an excuse. Only her self-respect now. But she’s told herself she no longer deserves respect, because she’s a dirty slut for having rape fancies, and those dirty little fancies having turned her on big. Her perverse self-conditioning has brought her undone. She never expected an encounter with a controlling slick rapist, but knows she’s only herself to blame. There can be no more excuses now the reality of being plundered has made her horny and has now resigned to being the victim of rape. She just unleashed it with that final weak ‘yes’.“Come on then, slut whore,” I command, as I lurch up onto my feet. “I know you want this.” .
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