This was so different than our brief time before the vault. I found myself yearning for her to call me Ilias again.Perhaps her foot was bothering her. "How are you feeling? How is your foot?" I asked. "Please speak freely and honestly."There was a pause. "Thank you sire. My foot is throbbing but the pain is bearable." There was another pause, even longer, and then she cried, "Sire! I owe you a deep apology for my hysterics!"For all my command training, I was at a loss for what to say. The silence stretched out to a very long moment. Without thinking, I patted the side of her hip to show understanding.At my pat, Abigail sighed and continued. "In 8224, I was in my tenth year. There was a fire here at Qataban, at the girl's monastery. Do you know of it sire?" No. I've only been stationed here for a few months." There was more silence. I realized that even with permission to speak freely, Abigail was going out on a limb to initiate a topic of conversation. "Continue."I felt her nod. "It. Obviously it’ll only lead to his bedroom and I’m not sure I’m ready for such an intimate space. I look back at his chocolate liquid pools for eyes and I see he can tell I’m struggling with the decision. He waits patiently for me to come to my senses; waits for me to give in to him. I take three or four steps back from him, almost toward the foyer where my winter gear is safely stashed. All the while I’m watching him watch me and the look on his face turns to shame and hurt as he realizes that he’s scared me off already. Then it turns I stop and realize what I’m doing. What I always do: I’m running away ... again. No, Yalina, not this time, not again! I scream inside my head. I don’t want to be alone forever, and I certainly don’t want to live without knowing a man’s touch. And here was a fine specimen of a man waiting patiently for me to come to him. With my internal battle over, I slowly gesture for him to lead the way upstairs. His face couldn’t have broken into a bigger smile.
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