I thought, maybe, it would be a one-time thing. I thought maybe it would be this incredible period of passion and then it would die down and he’d move on. Or I would.I thought maybe that we’d hit it together on holidays and reunions - you know this deep secret that two horny guys shared - but otherwise, things would go back to normal.What I didn’t think is that he’d become obsessive - that he’d need it all the time. That I would comply with that need. Share it.I didn’t think he’d move back in - even though I insisted it should be temporary, which was a lie I told to myself while we unloaded the U-Haul … and even though I insisted that he should stay in his room (which was a lie I told myself to protect my eroding heterosexuality). I didn’t think it would go down hill from there.I didn’t think I’d be fucking him daily - multiple times a day. That I’d get him job at the company. That he’d be sucking me off in the Executive bathroom during lunch-hour.That - while driving home late after. " I'll try to be your fantasy," she said, her voice trembling."No," he said, patiently. "Jane, honey, listen to me. I think I love you, but I need to know." And you think that if you really love me, you won't get turned on my young girls any more?" She shook her head. "I can't compete with that. I'm not going to be young forever." I don't know what anything means," he said, frustration in his voice. "But I have to know about this. I can't... I can't ask you to make any plans until I get this figured out. I know what I feel for you. What I don't know is what I'll feel... out there. It isn't fair to either of us to leave that question unanswered." What if I still lust after my father?" asked Jane."You already decided a long time ago that nothing will come of that," said Roger."Can't you just decide that nothing will ever happen with any young girl?" asked Jane."I don't care if, while we're making love, you think of your father," he said. "At least not if it's only once in a while. But I.
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