I was surprised.She took my hand and led me out where we were assigned a cart and two partners to create a foursome. Our partners were two women in their late thirties or early forties. From their rings, they were both married. While attractive with good figures, they paled in comparison to the vixen piloting my cart. We went to the first tee and introduced ourselves as we teed up. I had noticed Beth’s bag. It was very nice particularly compared to my old bag, a hand-me-down from my dad.My clubs were better than the bag though were also used. We teed off from the middle position. I was the longest drive but Beth’s shot wasn’t far behind mine. The two ladies, Betty and Cathy, made good shots and followed them up with good placements on the green. Beth came up to make her shot and hit within five feet of the hole solidly on the green. My shot landed further away but playable.The four of us approached the green with our putters. Betty and Cathy putted marking their spots. I moved up for. I continued talking, slowly growing deeper in sorrow. ‘I don’t know how to be me anymore. I can’t be Kira, the old Kira, the way I used to be. That’s love isn’t it? When someone changes you, and you realize you can’t go back? …And when you lose them and you realize you can’t go on?’ I broke, and began to sob quietly. ‘I wish I knew how to fall out of whatever this is! Falling in is so easy, especially with him…it was so easy, easier than anything I’ve ever done. Why can’t leaving be just as simple? I wish I knew how to be something else, how to define myself as anything but his! How pathetic is that?’ Perhaps not as pathetic as spilling your heart out to a crippled horse, yet I didn’t care. I tried to steady my voice, looking down at the small injured animal. ‘But look at you,’ I bowed my head, almost as if I were praying, and turned to the young foal, who was gazing up at me with sad eyes. ‘You seem weak…’ I murmured as tears silently rolled down my cheeks. ‘I wonder if you will.
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