I tried to rally and sit up straight again. Marin was watching me with cold blue eyes.“I’m not leaving,” She announced.“I’m not going anywhere,” Suzi seconded. It was silent for a few minutes. Renée looked to Connie but the black cheerleader was unwaveringly strong. Hannah’s fingers drummed on the table.“We have to be here for Zoë,” Xiomara rubbed my arm, “She’s coming home.”“What if Pat comes back?” Hannah asked.“This is our home,” I tried reinforcing Xiomara’s point but I didn’t believe it, “I want her here.”“You’re just greedy,” Hannah pouted.I looked around the room. I had to take four big heavy breaths to keep my voice steady. I looked into Renée’s eyes. They appeared steady, green and waiting. I smiled, as lightly as I could. She blushed and turned her eyes down, just for a moment. Connie smacked Renée’s knee with her own and the blonde girl sat up straighter and looked me in the eye.“It’s not greed,” I turned back to Hannah, “You’re mine. I want to look out for you. I want you. We flirted constantly even though we both dated other people. My senior year I gave subtle hints that I still had strong feelings for him, though he'd been dating someone for a while now. He caught on, I think, to the hints but it didn’t go anywhere. He wasn’t happy with his girl and was very vocal about it, and I can’t deny that I, slightly ashamed, thought about breaking them up. Back to the present, he's still with his girl and still vocal about being unhappy. In fact, I'm pretty sure she knows it. We've talked occasionally since I moved, more frequently since I told him I'm going to visit. He's made several not-so-subtle hints about us hanging out for awhile. So, of course, the smart thing to do is to prepare myself just in case. I take extra care while shaving and pack my best underwear set, ‘cause really, I don’t own a real lingerie set, but I’m working on it. So I visit my friends and I see him for the first time since I moved. He looks good. He got taller, which compared to.
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