They assaulted me with a constant barrage of crude comments, belittling me, degrading me, bombarding me from all sides. I felt so totally defiled. It was worse than the other night with Ted and his beer buddies. It was worse because Nathan was responsible for this.But then the strangest thing happened. Despite everything, I felt myself becoming aroused. I was stepping back into my fantasy again. I was being used and abused and degraded. I was about to be gang raped again!I was getting incredibly turned on. I was thankful that they were so rough. They were so self involved that I was certain that they wouldn't notice. And I was glad. That would be too humiliating.I realized that I could enjoy this, not just because it was my fantasy. I could enjoy this because I knew they wouldn't actually hurt me. I knew that because Nathan was here. Somehow I knew he wouldn't let anything bad happen to me. It was counterintuitive, I know. But I just knew it was true.I finally got a break as the men. Its been about 24 years now since it happened, and I think at last, its time to talk about it.There is no more Soviet Union today. But at the time the Iranians took the hostages, the US and the Soviet Union could have become easily embroiled in a world war if the US did to Iran what Iran deserved to have done to it.Until that point, the US Navy had been a fair weather Navy. We never had deployed US warships in that region during the extremly hot summer months. The Iranians were well aware of this, but they didn't figure that one lone US warship would have the nerve to face down the entire Iranian military all by itself.We did our part, but in my view deciding not to invade Iran was a blunder on Washingtons part. Of course, I can see the concern they most likely had about a reaction from the former Soviet Union, but I would have taken that risk if I were President, and I'm sure they were postive that Ronald Reagan would not hesitate to invade when he took over for Jimmy Carter. In.
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