The pregnancy hit her a few months before her first contract was about to finish. She wanted an abortion, but her ship was at sea and she did not have access to a clinic until it was too late. Rather than sign up again, she returned to civilian life to wait out the pregnancy. She applied to several universities and lived off her savings until the baby was born. She gave up the child for adoption. She had to, not because of her financial situation, but because she knew that her violent temper would make her an abusive parent. She cared for her daughter enough to know that she could not raise her. She was brutally honest about herself with the adoption agency. When her adoption counselor suggested that she seek help for controlling her anger, Burnside snapped ‘My temper is part of who I am. I can’t fix it. That’s why I’m here.’ Burnside avoided sex for almost two and a half years after she had her daughter. She was disgusted with having allowed herself to become pregnant. She knew. The six of us were rather different, and yet when it was time to create these songs, we all came together, completely into it.Eventually we arrived at the last song of the set, Other Side. It was the most challenging of the entire show, especially since we’d agreed to close with it. If we screwed it up, there could be no fixing it with a follow-up number. The multiple parts and epic length made it a trial to keep straight.“Everyone remember the new transition into the ending from this morning?” I asked.“Feels like that was a month ago, but yeah,” Colin replied. “Should we do just that part first, before we try the whole thing?”“Sure. Gwen, you’re going to keep the beat going on cymbals at the end of the second chorus in part two?”“I thought we were slowing down?”“Oh shit, you’re right... !”She smirked at me, which admittedly was as close as I’d ever get to a smile from her, so I took what I could get.“Sorry. Long day,” I grumbled, even as Muireann rubbed a sympathetic hand on my.
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