” I wanted to scream. I finally turned to my dad, “Did this ever happen with you and mom?”My Dad laughed, “More times than I’d care to admit. It scared me each time. I guess part of me wasn’t prepared to be a father. But I know you’ll be great parents. All three of you.”I stood up after my dad patted my back and I asked, “What car did you bring?”“The Beast.” Dad explained.The Beast was a huge van that he and I had been working on off and on for a few years. It was the first vehicle I bought. It was used and it was definitely a fixer upper. Fixing up the engine and the interior was hard yet fun. It gave us a lot of time to visit. We had agreed on just about everything about the repairs except for one thing. We fought over how to paint the outside of the thing so many times. I wanted to paint it with The Legend of Zelda theme on it but my Dad wanted a Bruce Lee. So we compromised. We painted it with mainly Legend of Zelda characters but some of them were in poses from different Bruce. Doors slide apart with their familiar pneumatic hiss and incessant high pitched beeps and with as little physical contact as possible, we all bustle our way into the carriage in an unspoken race to claim a seat.I need no seat today. Instead, I squeeze my way through the assorted bags and bodies to the doorway through which he always enters. There I hang from the hand strap half blocking the aisle, my eyes fixed on the vacant doorway awaiting his arrival.My heart thumps nosily in my chest and my palm feels damp against the plastic strap. I realise I am nervous and immediately chide myself for such silliness. I force an image of Doris Day into my head and make the melody of ‘Que, Sera, Sera’ float through my brain.“Please stand ...” the rest of the words are lost to me as he darts through the door. Seeing me directly in front of him, he pulls up short and tentatively glances around my body to take in the empty seat where I would normally be sat.He’s nonplussed, uncertain, his safe and.
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